Mum guilt

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Don’t go! Stay! Mummy no work! This has been Penelope the last few time I have been leaving for work. At first I though it was cute, I was loving the fact she wanted me to stay home. Then over the weekend Grace voiced her opinion on how I’m always working the weekend. Weekends for me at work are over time so extra pennies, but the kids don’t understand that.

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With both the girls voicing their strong opinions about me going to work on the other hand Eli actually doesn’t care if I’m at home or work as long as he got food and can play on his Xbox, he is oblivious to if I am there or not. the girls seem very aware.

To be honest this is the first job where the kids have been aware I leave the house, as when we lived in Cornwall Grace was to young & Penelope wasn’t born and when I did the dinner lady job, It was at Graces school and Penelope was tiny, as I said before Eli Just doesn’t care 😂
So the job I’m currently in, I work evenings Monday-Friday 5-8 which means I leave at 4.30, some time I sort tea some times Scott, I tend to miss bed time but sometimes Eli and Grace are still awake depending how strict Scott is being. I definitely miss Penelope’s bed time there only the odd time she’s been awake. Missing bed time gives me major mum guilt, I’m not saying I was mary poppins when I did bed time but I used to enjoy tucking them in, but also when I’m at work i sometimes relish in the though I’m not doing bed time.

Work has given me a leash of life where I feel I’m helping provided for the kids as well as actually having money of my own Scott presents for his birthdays etc and it not been money he actually earned. I think this is why I like doing the over time, I try not to do it every weekend but the extra pennies help. I have tried explaining to Grace that if I go to work the extra pennies pay for days out, new toys etc which when I explain I think she understands but I also think it’s hard for her as since she was born shes always been use to me be there all day everyday and now some weekends I’m gone before she wakes up and I get home just before it’s dark.

I feel very blessed to have to have a job that works around Scott so we can both contribute money wise and sharing the parenting helps. Many people ask who has the kids while I work and when I reply my partner, they seem shocked

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I have read so many post about mum guilt and never understood it until both my girls expressed there feeling towards me going to work. Does it ever go away? Do dads suffer from dad guilt? Or do we live in a Society where dads are just expected to go to work and put up basically. I’m hoping the older they get the more they will understand that me going to work was to help provided for them and to also show them that both parents are able to work and still be great parents.

 

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Thanks again for reading my ramble
Jx

Familybrock

 

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